Are Therapists to Blame for the Rise of Adults Cutting Off Their Parents?
Shoshana Rubli was shocked by her therapist’s advice, given in her second session. But the counselor was recommended by someone she knew and had impressive credentials,
so she did as she was told.
She cut off all ties with her mother.
“It was an argument made from authority, so I followed it,” says the 42-year-old freelance marketer.
Is it really good therapy to break your mother’s heart?
After decades of urging families to communicate better and work on their issues together, some therapists are now taking an opposite tack: They’re encouraging estrangement as a means of self-care.
Proponents of the trend hold that advising patients to consider a cutoff from a close relative or spouse they deem toxic or unsupportive can protect their mental health and allow for emotional growth. Meanwhile, critics-many of whom are researchers who have studied relationships for decades-say that it encourages self-centeredness and self-delusion and ruins families.
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