Because I’m an investor, I receive an inordinate number of pitches from companies seeking funding. Like CORPUS, the Netherlands-based 9-story, 135-foot human-shaped structure that offers an interactive “journey through the human body,” now seeking funding to build additional giants in China. Or less likely but potentially lucrative opportunities like a “poultry hotel” combining a 5-star hotel with an industrial-scale poultry farm (side benefit: guests get fresh eggs and chicken). Or a new fast-casual Asian brand that promises to revolutionize the U.S. dining scene. “Our strategy is simple,” says the pitch. “We aim to replicate the success of the other ‘John’ brands. Think Papa John’s, Jimmy John’s, and Taco John’s.” The investor presentation also mentions Johnny Rockets and Long John Silver’s. What’s missing? Asian John’s! The other Johns “have already helped build [the] Asian John’s [brand].” According to the founder (John), the key to success is locating “next to one of the other Johns. We put it next to a Jimmy John’s.” The marketing campaign writes itself: “There’s a new John in town.” Watch out Panda Express!